We are moving tomorrow. Since we are going to be 1/2 hour down the highway, we have to switch almost all of our utilities. We opted for DirecTV instead of cable. Since they don't provide intertoobs service, they have other businesses they 'partner' with (ie you sign up with one and get a discount). Here's how it goes:

I call DTV. It's one of those voice-responsive centers. It asks for my home phone number. We have not had a land-line for a year. I know my cell number, but Dear Husband set up the account and I can never remember his number (plus I left my cell at home so I can't look it up). They understand "yes" and "no", but not "I don't know". Now, if you have a human operator, they can then say, "What's your last name? I can look it up without a phone number". If it's touch-tone there's usually an option to get a human. Not so with the voice system. I repeat variations on "I don't know" until the third time it asks me to dial the number instead of saying it out loud. So I dial mine and at least it gets me into the system. Now Matt's information is what pops up on the guys screen, so he's totally confused because he asks for my name and it doesn't match. It takes a minute to sort that out.

Their partner in the area is Embarq. "Have you used any of their services before?"

"No, I've never even heard of them."

He has to transfer me. Cue one minute of him telling me he is transferring me. No kidding, every ten seconds he says he's transferring me and it will be just a minute. Finally the line goes silent, and someone picks up in what I am sure is either Pakistan or India. I have to go through the whole account name and number rigamarole again. Have I ever been an Embarq customer? No, I've never heard of them before. I tell him I want internet. He says phone and internet. No! Just internet! He has to look up packages, which will take a few minutes, please hold on.

Two minutes of silence.

Two minutes of bad elevator music.

I am picked up by DTV's customer care line. Name and account number rigamarole. I tell her what I want. She needs to transfer me to a partnering business. Have I ever used Embarq? No, I've never even heard of them (technically untrue at this point but I've just spent five minutes repeating things I had said twice already anyway).

Cue more bad music.

Picked up in another country, perhaps Mexico or Ecuador. Acount rigamorole. Ever heard? NO. Internet and phone? INTERNET ONLY. Must look up packages, please hold on.

Three minutes bad music.

Turns out they only offer internet bundled with a phone line. Any other options? Apparently there is a different company that provides satellite internet (?) but I'm not willing to be transferred to a fourth continent and am sick of the rigamarole.

We, or more truthfully Matt, will be looking into outside providers. AT SOME OTHER TIME.

Here was my day:

My students snuck into the lab last night and finished grain size analysis. I came to work to find all of the samples completed. I nearly cried! This was the high point of my day.

I went outside to do soil core descriptions. I was not dressed for it, so my nice pants are mussed and I'm pretty sure I got a burn.

My mp3 player ran out of juice.

I stabbed myself in the finger with a pencil and lodged a 1/4-inch piece of lead next to my fingernail. I got it out using a thumbtack and lancet...eventually.

My computer took a shit and died. Not even a blue screen of death. A black screen of  -- .

So now several hours of work are gone because I do major back-ups on Fridays. Of course!

I want to cry/get drunk. I guess that means the semester is coming to a close.

Let's start off: I haven't been sleeping, and when I do I've been having the professor-version of "forgot about the final" dream.

I had a student who told me she was going out of town and was going to miss a lab. I told her to make up the lab in another time, before she left (because this week is the lab final). So of course she shows up today to try and make up the lab. I tried to explain that she missed her chance (nicely) and that it was finals this week. After I get done with class, I receive a scathing email about me not telling her exact dates and times and she didn't know we even had lab finals, she was dismissed abruptly, she got up extra early for nothing, ect. I politey respond, apologize for not giving her exact dates and times, and offer to drop the zero she received. We'll see if she responds.

So now I'm extra worn out. I'd consider going home early today and napping, BUT the husband doesn't pick me up until 4:30. Maybe I'll nap on my office floor.

Been awhile, hasn't it? I blame GSA. I had a talk at the sectional meeting and I got all wrapped up preparing/resettling in. I feel like it stole a month of my life. Anyhoo, I had some good reactions to my talk, made some contacts, had an offer from the Indiana Geological Survey to take some free samples and equipment off their hands next time I am in Indy (?). I also now have 2 undergrads, maybe a third, and one high school kid for my summer project (you need one of each). We lost most of the high schoolers to Mark, because he's studying turtles. You can NOT compete with turtles.

Now I am trying to exit the semester as smoothly as possible, and it's not quite working. I had at least one student get married and change their name, and several sick students who need to drop two labs instead of one, so grade-entering will be a biscuit. I also got into an NSF-sponsored academic career workshop (with a day at NSF!) which unfortunately plops right at the beginning of my summer project AND dovetails with NAPC, so NAPC is out again this year (I missed last time because it was in Nova Scotia and I couldn't afford the plane tickets). I'm getting sort of pissed at this point.

Matt is also extra-whiney about all the leaving I am planning to do, altho he is coming to GSA in Portland this fall.

Commencement is May 10th, so I'll be back in Chi-town FINALLY. Hopefully I can see everyone. I need a full week to get all my friends and family in, it seems.

I am all out of pithy comments about pop culture. Let me see the Wolverine movie and I'll get back to you.

One of my colleagues showed up today in an orange shirt. I asked him if it was a political statement, but he demurred.

Yes, it's only a 3-hour movie and they can't get everything in, but then you lose the meta-narrative and the underlying theme of superheroes only making things worse for normal people.

Spoiler in the comments.

I am probably the only person in the world to stand in the sock-and-slipper aisle at Target and shout "ooooo SNAILIES fuck YEAH". But I am now the proud owner of bright aqua socks with gastropods all over them.

The secret news? I have been awarded an internal grant of $5500 to work with a student team examining soil patterns up in the Loess Hills. Fuck yeah, summer research!

One I'm not allowed to talk about until I get official confirmation, so I'll stay mum on it for now.

Two, I have been accepted to attend the Teaching Paleontology in the 21st Century workshop at Cornell. It will be FILLED with wonderful people I love AND will help me put together the class I'm supposed to teach next fall. It runs the last weekend in July, so it doesn't conflict with my summer semester. I will also have time to pal around with some of the wonderful people I will be seeing! Sort of a mini-vacation. If you consider conferences vacations. And I do.


We are also visiting Chicago this weekend FINALLY I get to see my friends!


And for loves: AWESOMENESS